Things I've Learned From My Children:
If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.
When you hear the toilet flush and the words uh-oh, it's already too late.
Brake fluid mixed with bleach makes smoke, and lots of it.
A six-year-old can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year-old man says they can only do it in the movies.
A magnifying glass can start a fire even on an overcast day.
Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a four-year-old.
Duplos will not.
Play-doh and microwave should never be used in the same sentence.
Super glue is forever.
Pool filters do not like Jello.
VCR's do not eject peanut butter and jelly sandwiches even though television commercials show they do.
Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
You probably do not want to know what that odor is.
Always look in the oven before you turn it on.
The fire department in San Diego has at least a five minute response time.
The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earth worms dizzy.
It will however make cats dizzy.
Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
Quiet does not necessarily mean don't worry.